Yeah it's true. He probably wouldn't want me to tell you this, but he asked me to spot him while he did it. I went to the other room to get some fritos and when I came back I knew something was wrong. Fwiw, I thought he wouldn't make it but he was balls deep in his own mouth… if you can envision a man that fat with his dick all the way in his mouth, you're a more imaginative man than I because I never expected him to actually do it. It actually took a moment to even figure out what I was looking at, because I've never really seen anything that approached it… the closest thing was picrel.
There was this look of sheer terror in his glazed-over eyes, I don't think any face I've ever seen has approached it. It was as though he was beset upon by some eldritch malevolence from the dark pits of eternity, and at once it was like he had stared straight into the unmasked face of the divine and been washed beyond recognition in its burning, purifying light. If Matt Christman survives going balls-deep in his own mouth and stuffing his pudgy penis into his fat, gaping face like a turkey on Thanksgiving, it will be nothing short of a Christman miracle.