>>5955You don't know that. Pic rel is an example of a woman chasing men, sleeping with men to fulfill her need for power and control. And self worth issues. Search up 'limerence'.
Some paragraph quotes:
He explained that in my unconscious way of processing relationships, I was simply not seeing people. Not as human beings, ever, at all. What I am actually seeing is a mirror, a reflection of myself. As in, the way they see me entirely defines my value. I have no real sense of self properly speaking, and I am constantly looking for reassurance of my worth in the mirror that men represent. What this means, is not only that I don’t really value them as I thought I did (fantasizing the perfect partner when he is in fact a piece of shit), but also that when I feel like falling in love, I’m actually falling in love with myself.
This is THE CHASE. When a man is inaccessible, doesn’t want me, pushes me away, the reflection I get in the mirror is so awful that I can’t love myself - I actually hate myself so bad that it becomes a challenge to prove myself that I am worthy of love, through him, and finally be able to love myself.
My tool is SEX. This is my bait. All of this is activated by an unconscious and stronger than anything drive for POWER and CONTROL. I realized that when I’m rejected, ignored, I am actually more ANGRY than I am sad. The less control I have, the bigger the obsession.
To sum it up, I realized that when I fall in limerence for someone, it has actually not much to do with who they are, but everything to do with me and what I need to prove myself. Yes, sometimes physical chemistry is real, but it’s also biased and emphasized by the need for power and control when I feel it slipping away. It NEVER means emotional or intellectual connection when you don’t actually know or love someone for who they are.